Especially at the beginning of my time in Buenos Aires, I really had no choice but to sit and listen. I arrived a year ago with a basic level of Spanish so I could not easily express my ideas, thoughts, or ask questions in their language. I sat in many meetings in order to learn about the community. A lot of the time I did not understand anything that was going on, I pretty much was forced to sit and listen. Each day I started to understand more Spanish. Eventually I could speak well enough to share my thoughts, ideas, and ask questions but I still continued to listen. But also began to ask lots of questions because I came to understand the importance of listening and asking questions.
Listening teaches so much more than talking. It lets you understand what the other wants, needs, and understands. Really listening (and sometimes asking clarifying questions) helps you understand where the other person is coming from and where they want to go. It allows the conversation to go to a place where it should go instead of merely where you want it to go. Listening helps form stronger relationships with others because it gives both an equal chance to share. Listening allows you to recognize where opportunities exist to help, collaborate, or give advice. Asking questions while listening is extremely valuable because it helps you understand what the other person is really saying, lets the other person know that you understand what they are saying, can help push their thinking to the next level, and lets you know how to properly respond. By asking questions and listening I came to really understand what was going on in the communities I work this year and where I could best offer my help.
There were many times when my teens would be talking, stop, and ask "but Kate, what do you think?". I would smile and say honestly, I first want to hear what YOU think. Next I would ask many questions hoping to impel them to think harder, more broadly, and more creatively. In this sense, listening allows the other person to push themselves to think more analytically and allows more creative thought to come to surface. It also let me know where I could let me teens develop themselves and where they needed me to support them. I really think one of the main reasons the BBYO partnership in Hebraica grew and strengthened this year is because I listened. I listened to what my teens wanted, what Hebraica wanted, what BBYO wanted, asked questions to clarify, and acted accordingly to help make it happen. I listened in order to find opportunities and then acted based on what I had been hearing. Gracias a listening for this!
Even though I now understand and can communicate in the language that surrounds me in Buenos Aires, I still listen. Now I can just easily ask many more questions than I could before. I know I'll continue to listen and ask questions in all parts of my life moving forward because I now truly understand all that listening and inquisitiveness offer.
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